Don't be so hard of your self - Self-compassion improves happiness

The concept of “self-compassion” is getting much attention at present in the world of psychology. Self-compassion refers to adopting a kind, non-judgemental, accepting attitude toward oneself and one’s problems. In contrast, low self-compassion is associated with self-criticism and rumination (the tendency to get stuck in cycles of over-analysis and worry). These are two primary contributors to anxiety and depression, and other mental health issues.

In fact, the research shows that self-compassion can buffer against anxiety and depression, increase our resilience to stress and even improve our feelings of happiness, optimism and conscientiousness. Hence, it’s imperative that if you want to lead a happier life, you must practice self-compassion. How can you learn to adopt a more compassionate attitude toward yourself? Below are five ideas.

1. Accept your weaknesses

Adopting greater self-compassion means being able to recognise your weakness and vulnerabilities, and feel compassionate toward those misgivings rather than berating yourself for having them. Got huge thighs? So what, at least you have a cute nose! Have a poor memory? OK, annoying at times but at least you have a big heart. After all, what does berating yourself really do anyway? It doesn’t change a weakness; in fact it just gives it more power. Instead, choose to feel compassion for yourself for your vulnerabilities.

10 Tips to make your Love Happy - Bloom your Relationship

By SC Chua for Yahoo! Southeast Asia

1. Go on date nights
"Couples should never stop courting," says Lou Paget, a sex educator and author of Hot Mamas. Going on dates with your significant other can help reignite the spark and bring back joy to the relationship.

Pick a time and a venue, and consider it a treat for the two of you. Bring back the lust by revisiting spots you went to on your earlier dates. Make sure you take the time and dress up for your date. Nothing like seeing you all spruced up to make him feel wanted and naturally attracted to you. Also, leave the mobile phones out of your date nights (or at least stop constantly checking it); everything else can wait! "The key is to pay attention to your mate," says Paget.

What is best - Saving or Investing? How to Earn More in this financial Tips

What if I told you I’m going to eat as much as I can now, so I won’t have to eat next year? Yeah, stupid, and a good analogy for saving to get rich. There’s a huge difference between “rich” and just “not poor”. Investing makes you rich; saving keeps you from bankruptcy. Good financial sense is a balancing act between the two: not letting your money stagnate with savings, and not blowing it on bad investments. In this article, we dispel some common myths about savings:

When it comes to finance, size matters.

What’s the Difference Between Saving and Investing?

Savings minimize risk, while investments maximize growth. It’s the difference between getting $2 for every $1, or just burying your money under a rock.

Savings preserve liquidity, making sure you have access to your money when you need it. Investing, on the other hand, requires commitment; investing temporarily removes your money (or your access to it) in the process of growing it. That’s why between the two, savings provides more psychological comfort. Our lizard brains are conditioned to hoard money, like dogs burying bones, or cats hiding food in the sofa.

Happy 4th of July - Independence Day of United States of America

Happy Independence Day - 4th of July, Wednesday 2012

Independence Day is the birthday of the United States of America and is celebrated on the Fourth of July each year. Independence Day is the anniversary of the day on which the Declaration of Independence was adopted by the Continental Congress on July 4, 1776.

John Adams, one of the founders of our new nation, said, "I am apt to believe that it will be celebrated by succeeding generations as the great anniversary festival. It ought to be commemorated as the day of deliverance, by solemn acts of devotion to God Almighty. It ought to be solemnized with pomp and parade, with shows, games, sports, guns, bells, bonfires, and illuminations, from one end of this continent to the other, from this time forward for evermore." Independence Day was first celebrated in Philadelphia on July 8, 1776.

In 1941, Congress declared July 4 a legal public holiday.

10 Ways to make your Love Life Bloom and Happy

By SC Chua for Yahoo! Southeast Asia

1. Go on date nights
"Couples should never stop courting," says Lou Paget, a sex educator and author of Hot Mamas. Going on dates with your significant other can help reignite the spark and bring back joy to the relationship.

Pick a time and a venue, and consider it a treat for the two of you. Bring back the lust by revisiting spots you went to on your earlier dates. Make sure you take the time and dress up for your date. Nothing like seeing you all spruced up to make him feel wanted and naturally attracted to you. Also, leave the mobile phones out of your date nights (or at least stop constantly checking it); everything else can wait! "The key is to pay attention to your mate," says Paget.

2. Wear his cologne
You love how he smells, so why shouldn't you be treated to that masculine scent all day long? Research shows that smelling your man is actually an aphrodisiac. According to researchers at the Kinsey Institute for Research in Sex, Gender and Reproduction, the scent of a man's cologne can significantly increase a woman's arousal. "[Smelling your man's cologne] will certainly help put you in the mood," says Cynthia Graham, Ph.D., one of the researchers.

So the next time you're missing your man or if he is away for a business trip, dab a little of his favorite scent behind your ears. Chances are, you'll be ready to pounce on him the minute he walks through the door.

3. Keep the TV out of your relationship
You've probably heard this many times, but we feel it still needs to be reinforced in all relationships: limit your TV time as a couple. Here's why: A research from Purdue University reveals that people who chat while the TV is blaring look at their companions 36 percent less often than they do when it's turned off. As result, your alone time with your partner is a less satisfying (and definitely less intimate). "With the set turned off, you'll create more opportunities for conversation and be able to focus on your loved one as you talk," says study author Glenn Sparks.

4. Laugh together
According to a study in the journal Motivation and Emotion, couples who share a laugh were more satisfied with their relationships than those who didn't. And when you are more satisfied with your relationship, chances are your sex life will also be more amazing. Explains Doris Bazzini, lead author of the study: "Laughing together builds a supply of good memories. You'll call on it later when times get tough."

5. Get rid of a negative body imageNobody wants to get intimate if they think they're fat/ugly/undesirable/insert negative body image here. Many times, being negative about how you look can be a downer for any relationship. The key here? The faster you get rid of all that negative body image, the better it will be for your sex life. Laura Berman, author of Real Women, Real Sex, explains that your partner won't see your areas as problem areas until you point them out. So make sure you stop putting yourself down in front of your partner and just enjoy his admiration for your body instead!

To take it a step further, why not indulge him by dressing the part? Kick off your baggy T-shirt and unshapely pants; instead, start wearing clothes that are flattering to your body! It won't hurt to invest in a pair of lacy underwear to help you feel sexy underneath.

6. Set the mood in the bedroom

Venue plays a part when it comes to a great sex life. So an overly cramped, messy and dull bedroom can fizzle out whatever desire you both have for sex. "If you can do anything to transform your bedroom into something new and different, that can make a big difference," advises sex therapist Louanne Cole Weston.

You don't have to give your bedroom an overhaul to achieve this. Do small things like light up candles at night or invest in mood lighting to set a romantic vibe, getting silk sheets (for that smooth sensation) and also removing the junk out of your room to create more space and peace within.

7. Go in for a hugHugs can prove to be more than just comforting; it can also create a sense of connection and be a foolproof foreplay. Says Dr. Ian Kerner, sex and relationship counselor as well as author of She Comes First, "Studies show that a 20-second hug raises the level of the 'cuddle-hormone' oxytocin, which facilitates a sense of love and connection. It's a way of bookending the day and entering the new chapter of the evening. Men need to be hugged three times as much as women to reach similar levels, so go for a full minute of hugging."

The next time you see your guy, make sure you greet him with a nice long hug. Plus, being so close to you and touching your skin that way is a great way to get him wanting more.

8. Manage your stressThe instant sex killer? Stress. Who has time to think about being intimate when you're worried about everything else!

Be careful—letting stress take over your life will result in an unsatisfying relationship as well as sex life. Suggest Irwin Goldstein, MD, director of San Diego Sexual Medicine and editor in chief of The Journal of Sexual Medicine: "People are overworked and stressed. And they translate their overworked, stressed lives to a lousy sex life."

Don't want to fall into the rut of stress? Why not go away on a vacation with your partner. Being able to leave all that work behind will free up your mind to enjoy the time with your partner—whether out sight-seeing or in the hotel bedroom.

9. Eat your way to a better sex lifeCertain foods are known to help boost your sex life. So the next time you go grocery shopping, make sure you include these into your shopping basket:
Oysters and avocados. Both are high in dopamine, a neurotransmitter that triggers the part of our brain that recognizes reward and pleasure.
Fish. Contains Omega-3 fatty acids, which improve your cardiovascular health and increase dopamine.
Chili. Helps to kick-start your nervous system and gets the heart racing—perfect for after-dinner fun!
Almonds. Contain a high level of arginine, which helps to boost blood flow. Better blood flow means heightened sensitivity.

10. Stay in shapePhysical activity can be a sure-fire way to keep things sizzling in the bedroom for a simple reason—the healthier you are, the better you look and the more confidence you'll have in your body. Plus, it'll help you enjoy sex even more. Says Sara Nasserzadeh, Ph.D. and co-author of The Orgasm Answer Guide, "Physical fitness absolutely affects the physical intensity and quality of sex." Also, research shows that exercise can help increase blood flow and improve your orgasms. So go on, grab your partner for a run. You'll enjoy the treat that comes after.

Being Happy with Yourself - Tips and Ways

Being happy is not dependent on how much money you earn, how many gadgets you have, or how many fancy cars you have. 

Happiness comes from a much deeper place; it comes from within you. All our lives we are constantly looking at external factors to make us happy – approvals from others, branded clothes, expensive shoes, iphones, ipods, new laptops and what not. But we fail to realize these things only offer transient happiness. If you want to be permanently happy, look inside, not outside. Initially, you might have to force yourself to be happy, but then it will become a habit.

Go easy on yourself

Forgive yourself for all the wrongs you have done in your life – being mean to a sibling, disrespecting your parents, stealing from your best friend, lying to your teachers. Whatever it is, however big a transgression it is, forgive yourself. Tell yourself it is fine. You’re human. Things happen. The important thing is to realize your wrongdoing and repenting for it. Once you’ve done that, breathe and let it go.

Forgive and forget

If others have wronged you in some way, find it in your heart to forgive them. There is nothing else that will give you as much peace. Don’t hold any grudges. It’s like carrying a heavy baggage on your head and being asked to walk up a hill. Discard the baggage and you will reach the top that much quicker. Look forward. Don’t harp too much on the past.

Enough with the judging/criticizing

Stop judging and criticizing people at once and you will immediately notice people around you increase in numbers. You will possibly make new friends thereby increasing your happiness quotient. Judging and criticizing shuts us down. We then don’t see the goodness in people, but just their flaws. Once you stop doing this, you will note how much space it clears in your head to think about other things. Try it.

Give

Give your time to others, do something for them. You could volunteer at a blind school or an orphanage. It could even be as simple as helping your mother with the household work – grocery shopping, cutting vegetables, or husking a coconut. Doing something for others makes you feel happy and content.

Stop fixating on your problems

Stop getting depressed over your problems, because the more you do the more depressed you will feel. Also, constantly thinking about your problems will only make them seem bigger and daunting than they really are. If you have an education loan you need to pay back, focus on how to pay it back, rather than focusing on how broke you are at the end of every month. One way around this is to not let your mind idle and busying yourself with things. The minute you feel you have been shortchanged, think of all the things that you have -- your family, the love around you, your current possessions, your present achievements in life, and be thankful for all of them.

Do what makes you smile

Do things that you enjoy doing. Take out time every day, if possible, or once a week to do the activities that you are passionate about – horse riding, swimming, stamp collection, reading, whatever it is.

Stop giving much attention to what others say

Stop paying too much value to others’ opinions about you. It’s okay to listen to them to see if there is something of value for you, but if it’s only criticism and their biased views about how you should live and behave and what is acceptable and what is not, then cover your ears and walk out.

Live your life. You’re only given one. Make full use of it. Do whatever it is you dream of doing, so that at the end of it all, you have no regrets.

Happy Fourth of July - Independece Day in America

Independence Day, commonly known as the Fourth of July, is a federal holiday in the United States commemorating the adoption of the Declaration of Independence on July 4, 1776, declaring independence from the Kingdom of Great Britain. Independence Day is commonly associated with fireworks, parades, barbecues, carnivals, fairs, picnics, concerts, baseball games, family reunions, and political speeches and ceremonies, in addition to various other public and private events celebrating the history, government, and traditions of the United States. Independence Day is the national day of the United States.

During the American Revolution, the legal separation of the Thirteen Colonies from Great Britain occurred on July 2, 1776, when theSecond Continental Congress voted to approve a resolution of independence that had been proposed in June by Richard Henry Lee of Virginia declaring the United States independent from Great Britain. After voting for independence, Congress turned its attention to the Declaration of Independence, a statement explaining this decision, which had been prepared by a Committee of Five, with Thomas Jefferson as its principal author. Congress debated and revised the Declaration, finally approving it on July 4. A day later, John Adamshad written to his wife Abigail:

London 2012 Festival: Opens on June 21, 2012

The London 2012 Festival, taking place 21 June –9 September is the finale of the four-year Cultural Olympiad. Complementing the sporting events at the London 2012 Olympic and Paralympic Games, the festival will be the biggest party the UK has ever seen with over 1,000 events taking place all over the UK – many of them free.

Summer Solstice 2012 - When will be the First Day?

Enjoy the first day of Summer this June 20, 2012. 

Summer is the warmest season of the year when the sun shines directly on one half of the world. Summer in the Northern Hemisphere begins about June 21st - the date of the summer solstice. It ends about September 23, the date of the autumnal equinox. Usually, July and August are the hottest months of the summer season. Crops, trees, and other plants reach their full maturity in summer.

When the sun is the high over the Northern Hemisphere, it is low in the Southern Hemisphere. The warmest months in the United States are the coldest months in Australia, and in the southern part of the South America and Africa. The growing season of Australia and Argentina is during the months of December, January, and February. These months compare with June, July, and August in the Northern Hemisphere. (apples4theteacher.com)

Happy Father's Day - June 17, 2012 (USA, Canada, UK)

Fathers Day for 2012 will be on June 17, 2012. Share your love with your dad and give the very best hug and thanks as they are the one who guides with endless care and love.

Best Father's Day Poems and Quotes

A Dad is 

A Dad is respected because he gives his children leadership. 
A Dad is appreciated because he gives his children care. 
A Dad is valued because he gives his children time. 
A Dad is loved because he gives his children the one thing they treasure most - himself. 

A Place Just For Dad 
We many not shower him with praise 
Nor mention his name in song, 
And sometimes it seems that we forget 
The joy he spreads as he goes along, 
But it doesn't mean that we don't know 
The wonderful role that he has had. 
And away down deep in every heart 
There's a place that is just for Dad... 

Internation Womens Day - MARCH 8,2012

THEME: Empower Rural Women – End Hunger and Poverty

Each year around the world, International Women's Day (IWD) is celebrated on March 8. Thousands of events occur not just on this day but throughout March to mark the economic, political and social achievements of women.

Organisations, governments, charities and women's groups around the world choose different themes each year that reflect global and local gender issues.

"Connecting Girls, Inspiring Futures" is the 2012 theme of the internationalwomensday.com website and this has been widely used by hundreds of organisations including schools, universities, governments, women’s groups and the private sector. Each year the United Nations declares an overall International Women's Day theme. Their 2012 theme is “Empower Rural Women – End Hunger and Poverty”. Many organisations develop their own themes that are more relevant to their local contexts. For example, the European Parliament's 2012 theme is "Equal pay for work of equal value".

Special Someone

Anyone can catch your eye, but it takes someone special to catch your heart.  ~Author Unknown


A hundred hearts would be too few
To carry all my love for you.
~Author Unknown


You have to walk carefully in the beginning of love; the running across fields into your lover's arms can only come later when you're sure they won't laugh if you trip.  ~Jonathan Carroll, "Outside the Dog Museum"


We're all a little weird.  And life is a little weird.  And when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall into mutually satisfying weirdness - and call it love - true love.  ~Robert Fulghum,True Love

Be My Valentine

Oh, if it be to choose and call thee mine, love, thou art every day my Valentine!  ~Thomas Hood


When love is not madness, it is not love.  ~Pedro Calderon de la Barca


Many are the starrs I see, but in my eye no starr like thee.  ~English saying used on poesy rings


Loving is not just looking at each other, it's looking in the same direction.  ~Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, Wind, Sand, and Stars, 1939


Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.  ~Albert Einstein